Unwanted Interruption

So if you follow me on Instagram, TikTok, or YouTube Shorts you would know that I have been going out on dates with someone lately.  Well, that has ended quite suddenly.  Here’s what happened.  Several months ago I innocently wished someone a happy birthday, and the conversation turned into him asking me out on a date.  Now a little further back story we tried to date over a decade ago but we were both not on the same page when it came down to it so we parted ways and we both went on to live our separate lives.  We kept in touch over the years and maintained a casual friendship.   Now back to the current.  He surprised me and asked me out to dinner and I agreed.  I got to pick the place and he picked the day.  I wanted to keep it casual and close to home so I could get home quickly if things went left or he didn’t show up.  To my surprise, he showed up with a gift in hand (a t-shirt from where he works that he was supposed to give me before) and a warm hug.  The conversation and the food were great and I didn’t get home till late so thank goodness I worked from home the next day so I could take a lunchtime nap if I needed to.   More dates followed and they were all great.  We even said that we were going to eat our way around St Louis and try as many restaurants as we could but it all came to a sudden stop.  So one date was canceled due to an unforeseen issue then the last date was never canceled I got ghosted.

Now I’m not a spring chicken so it’s not like this has never happened to me before but this time was different.  When we tried to date the first time communication and time spent were key factors for me and this time he was making up for it.  So to go silent didn’t hit right for me.  Now this was the year that I was celebrating 2 years of graduating college for the second time, working at my company, and being a first-time homeowner.  This was my 2 year anniversary year for all of that so for someone to come in and interrupt that was not what I planned on or even wanted.  I live pretty quietly and working on my home and my health has been my main priority for the past 2 years.  Yes, I will admit it would be nice to have some companionship but not like this or this way.  This situation has annoyed me over the past week because this was not on my 2023 bingo card and would have rather been left alone.

I will say this situation has gotten me out of the house and a bit out of my comfort zone so that’s some good things to take away from it but now I’m skeptical of anyone that wants to spend time with me.  I want to date/hang out with someone with intention and not just go out to go out (even tho I would be ok with that too).  Maybe I will keep eating my way around St Louis going by myself and if someone wants to join me that’s cool but don’t expect me to take things that are said about a future relationship seriously because I rather see it than hear it.  It is time for me to step out and have some fun and if it’s by myself then so be it.